Lifted from The Onion:
Hopes For 2006
What are your biggest hopes for 2006?
Nick Del Mar Waiter "A pair of novelty 2006 spectacles. At first, anyway."
Jim Sclavanous Package Delivery Man "I just want to stay on that bull for eight seconds. Eight goddamn seconds. Is that too much to ask?"
Nicholas Knox Chemist "Settle down, man. We're not even sure if Congress is going to approve funding for 2006 yet."
Miriam Bateman Tax Preparer "I hope they come out with a third, better Hilton sister."
William Linna Career Counselor "I just want to spend quality time watching my baby grow up. Of course, I guess I'd have to impregnate some sort of woman first.
Kate Alexander Produce Manager "Next year? But...but I only just finished this one! When may I finally rest?"
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